Cold Turkey
Monday, April 3rd, 2006
I had not always smoked. I survived UP college days smoke-free. Oh, ok. Maybe I puffed a stick or two then thought better of it. The habit never caught on. I thought the smoke reeked and my lungs just totally rejected it. Then law school came and as they say, the rest is history. Smoking became a crutch during wide-eyed nights reviewing for next day’s recitation. It became even more of a crutch when bar review came. Needless to say, I was hooked.
But I have always known that smoking was not good for me. In fact, it is down right bad news. But I smoked anyway, believing that my youth made me invincible. Seven years later, I started getting sick. There would be days I’d wake up out of breath, my throat itching like hell. And the "coughing" was not a party. Smoking was no longer fun. I have turned into a mature, presumably confident woman, who has learned to be comfortable with her own skin. I no longer needed the “stick” to look or appear cool or to simply deal with boredom…
And so the epiphany happened. I quit cold turkey. No stages, no easing into the process, just an abrupt realization that I did not want to wake up out of breath anymore. Life is funny this way. Knowing what hurts or harms us, we nonetheless gravitate towards that dreadful thing. Perhaps it is because we are such intelligent beings that we are able to rationalize every single event that happens in our lives, even the decision to smoke or to over-drink (alcohol, is there anything else?)… or to stay on in a mediocre relationship. Smoking is a bad way to pass the time, hanging on to the dying embers of an old flame is just plain pointless.
And so, as in all bad habits, quitting cold turkey seems to be the only way to go…no stages, no easing out- Just cut-off the dead weight with one swift motion. In the end, life becomes simpler that way…
